Having The Talk
by Chromantic
Summary: Chrom and Robin are engaged, and her friends are eager to hear just how their first night as an engaged couple went, only to be shocked to realise that Robin has no idea what they are truly interested in hearing. My first ever fan fic, written more as an attempt to get back into writing in general than as a serious piece so be as harsh as you want.


The Talk

Robin had been dragged by Lissa into the Cafeteria for what she called 'girl talk', despite Robin protesting that she really needed to devise a plan for their next battle, stating that Robin really needed to relax and bond with the other women in camp. She had relented only because she really did feel like an hour away from work would do her some good.

While she had at first felt hesitant to the other women camp, she was no downright terrified by the idea. It was clear ulterior motives had brought Lissa's insistence upon her because, apart from Miriel who had to chosen to sit at her side with her journal open, ready to jot down any notes as she always was, she sat alone on one side of the table with all the other girls on the other staring hungrily at her.

"So," smiled Sumia, "how'd everything go with Chrom last night?"

"It went well thank you, I was able to get to sleep easier than usual and it was the most rested I'd felt in a good while this morning," Robin answered, completely oblivious to the underlying question all the girls were really wanting her to answer.

Sully shifted a little, leaning on her elbow, catching Robins attention. "So you're saying you went to sleep early? Dammit that means I owe you Miriel".

Robin looked to her side to see Miriel nodding "I simply deduced, based on Chrom's usual attitude, that he would put the upcoming battle first and not keep our tactician up with...ahem," Miriel shifted a little on the spot, an out-of-place blush on her cheeks, "nightly activities"

"Ah well I asked him to play a game of chess with me but he declined. He seemed a little put off really, but I thought it made sense to try to teach him tactics, after all I can't always be everywhere at once," Robin said, nodding her head a little sagely with a smile on her lips. "We'd just told every one of our engagement but I didn't want it to get in the way of what's most important now while we're still fighting"

At this point even Maribelle, who had seemed a little less interested than the rest, was leaning in with a bemused expression on her face. "Robin dear, you do understand what Miriel meant by 'nightly activities', right? That was just another one of your witty comments as usual, correct?"

Before Robin could answer Panne chimed in. "Actually, man -spawn, I'd say she doesn't. The blank look on her face says it all." That was a little harsh, Robin found herself thinking, but she hadn't spoken to Panne much yet as she was a new recruit, and from what she'd heard she knew she had little love of humans. She had been surprised to find she was even included in this strange 'girl talk' that should really be renamed 'make Robin talk'.

Lissa hummed a little, as though she was thinking, a puzzled look on her face before a glint in her eye announced to everyone that she'd had an idea. "I think...she might not know"

At that, everyone stared at Lissa incomprehensibly. Sumia giggled a little bit, though nervously "that can't be true right? I mean she's our age, how couldn't she kn-" Sumia bit her tongue as if to stop her own thought and it clicked with everyone just what was going on, and everyones attention shifted from Lissa to the incredibly uncomfortable Robin.

"May as well cut straight to the chase," Cordelia said, finally speaking up. "Robin love, do you-"

"Robin do you know what sex is?" Sully asked, talking over Cordelia. Everyone took a breath in and looked at Sully. "You said cut to the chase, no point being pansies about it. Well?" Sully questioned again, all eyes turning to Robin again.

"Of course I do!" Snapped Robin, angry at the question. "It's when the man touches the ladies secret garden right. That's what that romance book Sumia lent to me said" Robin recounted, having recently read a rather odd romance novel only two nights before.

"Oh dear me," mumbled Maribelle.

"Manspawn, you don't know what mating is?" Panne asked, genuinely curious despite already having figured out Robins lack of knowledge.

"I..I..I just said that I did," stammered Robin, defending herself. Her mind was whirling. Clearly her amnesic mind had forgotten something important enough that her not knowing about it was making her friends treat her like an invalid. She could remember how to use a sword, cast magic and tactics. Knowledge of things she knew beforehand came easy to her once she met with it, such as remembering things about the Plegia desert when they had entered it. But whatever this "sex" thing is was clearly not turning up any old memories. Maybe she'd never been taught about it in the past?

Obviously, Robin was not to know, but as the intended vessel of Grima, something like reproduction was far from important in an Avatars education, and even her mother who had given her life free her from such a fate had been much more concerned with teaching her the skills necessary to survive out in the world. No one in her whole life, before or after her unfortunate case of amnesia, had ever explained to her just what a loving couple did to express their love.

Despite her cries to the contrary everyone was increasingly aware of just how innocent Robin was when it came to things of that nature. They were surprised she'd fallen in love at all, maybe Sumia lending Robin fictional books was what had allowed her to realise that her feelings for Chrom were that of love, it wouldn't have surprised any of them if she'd had no idea what her feelings meant in light of her naïvety. Much to her embarrassment and horror, Sully and Miriel, with unnerving detail, described to her exactly what sex was. Inappropriate hand gestures included.

"Oh gods," Robin muttered to herself, aghast. "I..I never even..this is so embarrassing I must look such a fool," she was tearing up, surprising everyone. Their tactician was known for her ice-cold demeanor, something they knew she put on as protection because of her trouble connecting with people due to her lack of trust in herself over her unknown past. To see her so vulnerable made them all feel guilty.

"Robin," Miriel spoke, taking everyone by surprise as she slowly stroked Robins arm in comfort. "There is nothing embarrassing about this. It is a talk everyone faced at some point, even myself despite having read about it many years previous in my mothers books before she took it upon herself. Your amnesia clearly erased more than otherwise we knew," and then the usual glint of curiosity revealed itself in her eyes. "I must do more research, we should cover subjects from birth to adulthood that most would learn and see what knowledge you have and haven't retained. Maybe we could use this t-argh," Miriel was pushed roughly to the side by Panne who had taken pity on the tactician and had seen where Miriels ramblings were heading. She sat down between them and looked her in the eyes.

"Do not be ashamed, even in the warren a mother would tell her youngling of topics like this. It is a families duty and in place of what you are missing we will fill that void," she patted Robin on the head awkwardly but it cheered Robin up to see the distant Panne being so kind to her. But then she remembered and her face fell.

"Naga help me..."

"What is it Robin?" Asked Cordelia?

Lissa smirked and covered her mouth, "I think I may have an idea based on my brothers lovely mood this morning when he left their tent before Robin."

"Last night when he asked me if there was anything I wanted to do before turning in, he kissed me on the neck and had this strange look on his face," everyone was giggling at this rate, even Maribelle who had found the whole sex talk mortifying, exclaiming how words such as those used by Sully should never be used by a maiden, was having a hard time covering her laughter. "That's why I recommended the chess game. He seemed really down and ended up sleeping on the chair instead of our cot. I thought he was just worrying about the battle like he usually does coming up to one."

"Chrom was sulking?" Asked Sumia, mouth agape.

"Hahaha, our commander's been walking around with blue balls. I knew he'd try something, that means I win Miriel," Sully smirked, triumphantly. Miriel nodded sadly, scribbling notes in her journal, probably pertaining to some mystifying theory.

"He proposed to you yesterday and tried to get you in bed the same day. I expected better of my brother," Lissa said, genuinely seeming a little disappointed in his haste.

"But..but he didn't go any further when he saw she wasn't interested right?" Cordelia highlighted, eager to defend her commander.

"Who was to know our commander was such a horndog?" Sully said before roaring with laughter.

"AHEM."

Silence.

Everyone turned red-faced, spare for Panne and Robin who'd retreated into her own little mortified world, to see the 'horndog' Chrom stood to their side, a large smile plastered to his face that managed to strike a primal fear in all those seeing it.

"I'm a what now?" There was a noticeable vein bulging just above his right eyebrown and no one found the courage to speak. Robin who had come back now found herself too shame faced from her new perspective of the previous nights events to speak, instead managed to let out a squeak.

"Robin are you okay?" Chrom asked, concerned. His anger instantly vanishing, everyone else gone from his vision he moved round the table in a flash, hand on her shoulder.

"Er...yes. Yes I'm very fine. I'm okay. Great. Never better haha..." Robin trailed off looking away.

"About last night..." Chrom started.

"I am so sorry!" Robin shouted turning to face him. "I...I..." she tried to put into words how she hadn't known but she couldn't finding it too embarrassing to admit that she'd said yes to his proposal of marriage unaware of such a vital piece of information on just what marriage would entail.

"No Robin, I spoke to Frederick and Vaike earlier and they made me realise that I shouldn't have put pressure on you like that, especially not so soon after the engagement. I guess despite my princely training, after hearing you say yes, and seeing you in your night-gown like that," Robins usual pale skin flushed just ever so slightly, "I got ahead of myself."

"No," Robin smiled sweetly, "it makes me happy that you find me attractive enough that you'd get like that, and it makes me even happier that you respect me so much to wait for me, but that's not the problem."

An eyebrow arched, "it wasn't? I didn't come on too strong?"

"Ah, well, no, in retrospect you probably did. I don't want to upset you Chrom but Maribelle let me know that it's tradition to wait till the wedding night and I'd like it if we could do that. I know our emotions are running high on the battlefield but I think that's all the more reason to wait. I plan on getting us all out of this alive and I want our wedding night to be special," she smiled warmly at her fiancé and her smiled back, stroking the back of his neck a bit ashamedly.

"You tell him dear," Maribelle quipped and Chrom's head shot round to see the onlookers who had watched everything with eager eyes.

"You're all still here," he managed to say, lips slowly returning to the terrifying smile from before. Without a second to lose they all made up excuses to leave, and leave they did. Though, only to outside the cafeteria and a bit to the side. There was no way any of them were missing this. Even Panne had found the whole ordeal entertaining, and after the bit of bonding she'd had with Robin she wanted to make sure Chrom didn't do anything to make her feel ashamed about her lack of memories and knowledge in what she was clearly about to reveal to him. She'd have him for supper if he did.

"You were saying?" He asked.

"I didn't know," Robin stated clearly, looking him dead in the eye, willing herself to have confidence.

You didn't know?" Chrom asked, eyebrow arching again, as it always does when he's confused.

She squeezed her eyes tight for a few seconds then opened them. "I don't know if I ever knew, but I didn't at least since you found me in that field," she saw Chrom's eyes widen a margin, understanding slowly beginning to dawn. "I mean I'm not a complete fool," she hastened to add, "I understood about kissing, and I knew I'd eventually bear you a child and we'd have a family but I didn't get the whole...mechanics." She stopped to take a deep breath, gods this was embarrassing she thought. "So when you...suggested we do something," again with the rare red tint on her cheeks. His hand reached out to stroke her face and he leaned in to kiss her, touching her lips gently with his own.

"I'm sorry for making you feel like that, and making you feel like you had to explain yourself. It should have occurred to me that this was a possibility, I know more than most just how much you struggle without your memories." She smiled lovingly back at him and his heart warmed up, filling his body with heat.

"Anyway!" He said quickly, standing up lest her take her there and then, "what did you tell them that led to the opinion that I am, as Sully put it, a 'horndog'?"

"Ah," Robin laughed, "they were actually explaining everything to me and I just mentioned that I think you might have tried to get me in the mood last night when you kissed my neck"

"Ah gods, I should have known that was the type of thing you girls would talk about. Especially considering Sully and Stahl's engagement, and Lissas with Lon'qu also. They're always discussing each others romantic moments trying to outdo each other." Chrom laughed as well. "So they all told you together? I can't even imagine, gods, my own "talk" was bad enough."

Robin inclined her head to show interest.

"No, Robin. I am not reliving that particular moment. Can you imagine Emmeryn speaking of such things to me?" As her said it Robin began shaking her head as if the image was truly awful. "And she was so formal about it was well! She had diagrams hand drawn and had me and Lissa both sat down in the Royal chambers..." He shook his head in wry amusement.

"I thought you didn't want to talk about it," Robin teased.

"Ah yes you're right. Back to business!" his fist hit his open palm. "I actually came to get you to discuss the plan tomorrow. Frederick will be wondering what's taking me so long, come now my love" He offered his open hand and she obligingly took it, walking side by side to the tent where Frederick awaited.

"We have to protect her!" shouted Lissa catching the other girls unaware, all of them jumping and Panne instinctively switched to beast mode knocking them all over. Grumbling they all stood back up, Panne apologising, although she didn't actually seem sorry, but rather amused.

"We have to protect her?" Inquired Maribelle.

"Yes! Until they get married we have to make sure we keep Chrom too busy to even think about laying his hands on our Robin," Lissa proclaimed, patting herself on the back.

"I don't think Chrom would try anything," Sumia and Cordelia chorus'd, giggling after they did.

"I know, but you saw that look he gave us right. We have to pay him back for that. And I don't want him taking my Robin away from me just yet," Lissa huffed.

"I agree," Miriel stated.

"You agree?" Lissa asked incredulously.

"Frankly speaking I consider Robin my closest friend. Chrom is a good man but he has already admitted a weakness to his own hormones so we should do our best to help him control them," Miriel concluded, already jotting down plans on how to best achieve said results.

"I'm surprised to see that you humans are so capable of creating such bonds as to care so deeply," Panne mused, smiling perhaps her first genuine smile since joining the shepherds. Well, her first genuine smile to anyone besides Gauis.

"We'd do the same for you as well Panne dear, you are one of us after all," Maribelle stated, wrinkling her nose a little. It was not like her to act so forthcoming with her feelings like that, but Panne had moved her earlier with how she'd calmed her friend and she found herself wanting to make her feel welcome.

"Thank you," Panne said simply, before walking off.

"Where you off?" Asked Sully.

"I don't play games, their meeting will finish soon and I'll steal her away for a few hours then. You humans are too sly, it is better when you are honest like Maribelle," Panne said. Maribelle, taken aback by the compliment, found herself smiling a rather happy smile. _How unlike me,_ she thought to herself.

Lissa giggled happily to herself at the back looking at her oldest friend, and then at each of the others. _I'm glad Robin joined us_, she thought to herself, _she's brought us all closer and our bonds are stronger than ever. I hope one day I can pay her back_

And she would come to, as would the rest of the Shepherds, years later.


End file.
